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Right and wrong!

Over a period of last two-three years, I have come to a phase of stormy changes. The first ever change was that there is never a right or wrong! Fuck! This was the biggest and rudest shock. So all my life I have been told that do no wrong, do the right thing, this is wrong and this is right and all of a sudden my eyes open and my brain shouts- “There is no right or wrong.”

I have also come to realize that we are at our unnerving best, when we are challenged. This was one of those moments. I couldn’t take it. I sometimes feel that I still can’t. Sure there is some theory to it. For example, what is good to me, may be bad for you and vice versa. Meaning everything is subjective and everything is relative. What the fuck!

Sometimes I feel this is manipulation according to convenience.  I don’t understand. The truth is the definitions keep changing according to our convenience and in what spot we are in. At such times, how do you take decisions? So apparently, this is learning. What is the use of a ‘learning’ when all the thing does to you is hurt you or the worse- confuse you.

My head has apparently accepted it and asks me to manipulate things, people, situations accordingly. But the heart keeps on saying “Why hurt them.” “What if this happens to you.” If you take a close look at what I have said, it seems that most of these thoughts stem from FEAR. “Fear” of losing something, fear of letting something go… 

And if you analyse the emotion “fear”  you realize that it is perhaps one of the strongest /weirdest/ flaming because it is induced by something or someone – meaning external factors. 

What do you think?? 

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Wedding or stress?

You read the title..? You got it right and you read it right now. More than being happy, I am fuming right now. To the extent, that I am cursing myself for taking probably this “best decision” of my life. I truly believe that I have found a person who I can love and expect  love in return. But this best decision of my life is turning out to be the worst stress of my life.

Weddings are supposed to be full of fun, grandeur, happiness and joy. And especially if you are looking at an Indian wedding, everything turns out to be 2 X of the adjectives I mentioned.  But what most of the times goes unnoticed is the stress it brings to the wedding birds. In my case, I would like to stick to myself because I am being driven nuts.- Reason- ego clashes, hatred and chaos and all thanks to stupid customs in the Indian society. People are fighting because they want to gift “materials” and my mom is asking for cash presents. And I am against any gifts – cash or kind. 

My aunties are fighting because they want to  wear “nine-yard” sarees, but my mom asks them not to as the bride’s mom wont look any different from others. They fight because the bride can’t do the make up during the saat pheras as it is an early morning wedding. They fight because they can’t decide who will be the ‘bridesmaid.’ They fight because the bride wants to decide on her own mehndi design, her own wedding card, her trousseau colour, etc.

Right now, I am feeling like I am not getting married but in some kind of a sale, where everybody else decides what the bride or groom needs to do. Bride’s mother tells her – where to go for honeymoon, why to go, when to go, who should spend the kharcha and all.

For god’s sake- We are getting married. We are not kids. Can’t you understand this simply? We understand that it’s a big day to you. But it’s a big event in our lives too. Why do parents especially Indian parents simply don’t understand this?

Tired of my rants myself, I just have one simple thing to say to myself….

Dear Deepika- Que Sera Sera…..

 

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PRAXIS 2013- Why I am excited to be there….!!

My latest blog post after a real long hiatus. What could be more fortunate than getting back to the field with none other than #PRAXIS2013.

PRAXIS is India’s finest and first weekend summit for the public relations and corporate communications professionals. In fact, I would safely assume that PRAXIS is the only serious summit for communications in India. Don’t believe me? Meh, talk to Twitter India. Their website almost came crashing this time around, last year. Thanks to this networking site, I did not miss attending it’s first edition. I mentioned the same to Amith Prabhu (one of my biggest mentors- Well I can say that from whatever I know of him. He flew down to India just for voting in his constituency! *Bows down*). Post that, almost for a year he ensured that he reminded me to save money for PRAXIS2013 edition and block a berth for myself. Well, I did it  this time *proudly rolls eyes*. I am on my way PRAXIS 2013 at Lavasa. Yay!

So what is so exciting about PRAXIS 2013, that makes me so excited?? Here are few things:

1. First weekend summit: Whoever came up with this idea- Brilliant! Most of the summits are either on weekdays. So, if you are working, you are either dead, juggling between work and the event. Well, PRAXIS makes an exception! 🙂

2. For PR, By PR and Of PR: One of the finest summits organized by communication professionals. No matter, how young you are! If you are passionate about communications, you are welcomed here to contribute in any little way you can! Encouraging for freshers! Most importantly, the work done is out of free-will and good-will.

3. Work, Networking and Entertainment: Unlike some of the summits organized in the country, this one stands for work, making merry and lots of networking. In fact, I have formed some formidable partnerships and friendships  just by following their hashtag last year.

4. Top class execution: Well, it might be too early to say. But what the heck. Even in its first edition PRAXIS seemed to be executed very well. Brilliant venue, world-class speakers, great entertainment and value addition to the profession. You name it and PRAXIS has it.

If I start penning down more thoughts on why I want to attend PRAXIS, I guess there would be no end and you might get bored reading. 😐

Better come there and experience it for yourself? What say folks??

PRAXIS2013—- I am coming!! 🙂

For more details on the summit visit: http://www.praxis2013.in/

 

 

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Last two months of my life…..

September 01, 2012– This is the date I will never forget. It was pouring outside my office in Nariman Point. Everyone was stuck in the office. It was raining so heavily ( a very peculiar Mumbai trait) that all the train and bus services had started to stall. I was keen to go home nevertheless. Perhaps, I had never been so keen to go so early.  I went downstairs and barked at a cab. I said- “Will you come to Bandra?” That’s it. That was the MOMENT. I had moved ALONE to Bandra from my house in Navi-Mumbai.

I attribute this change partially to the long -traveling time it took for me to reach my work from New-Bombay. But the major reason was- I wanted to experience the “FREEDOM” the self-reliance and the independence in being away from my parents. Well, looking back, today it’s 9 months and I am yet to figure out if I am actually happy having moved away from my parents. One of the major reasons- behind me moving away from house is also this “influence” which I refuse to name. Off course, intelligent and “close-enough to me” people would know about who I am talking about. Well, I am also yet to figure out if this influence was good or bad. May be, I am refusing to acknowledge it as well. May be sometimes ignorance is a bliss!

Anyway, this was a big decision for me. I was apprehensive about moving to the new place. Am I committing  a mistake?  What if something happens to me? What if I was murdered? What if something happened to me? What if I went broke? What if I did something foolish? Am I actually separating my parents from myself forever? What? How will I do it? I am not used to doing my own work? Who will help me? Mom was unhappy, she thought I was trying to break ties with the family. May be she thought, I was a lesbian, or may be I had some affair! Ahem. May be I was planning to run! Oh Gosh! Then I thought, I am going to be independent. If nothing, I will just get closer to my parents. May be I will realize the importance and value of a ‘family.’ Oh and what about the convenience? I will be staying very close to work. Fast trains will be available. I will be able to go to pubs, clubs, movies, stay out and maro night-outs. But again, am I a party animal? Blah blah went my mind.

Anyway, cut to present, today is May 21, 2013. 9 months and some days after I moved out of my house. As, I write this blog, let me tell you- May be I have experienced life a bit. I have explored some parts of Bandra on my own. Some with my friends. Some with Srini ( yeah, my fiance and another reason to move back to Kharghar. I am getting married, so I need to move in with parents and spend ‘some’ time at least, before I leave forever. Sigh). Yeah, so coming back- I frequented pubs, some clubs, drank a lot and ate a lot of junk and outside food. Result- ever growing paunch! Damn! Does it matter. Nah, but still.

So, yeah I will be moving to Kharghar may be in the next two months and may be this was the duration of “MY life.” May be after this, I will never be able to maro night-outs, frequent pubs and drink to my heart’s contentment. Yeah, yeah, my life will not change after marriage. People are not that bad.. Ya right. Everyone is the same, until proven otherwise.

Anyway, I am not sad. I am just  feeling a bit low may be. But what the heck.

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Things fall apart….

Yes, perhaps this is one of the most amazing parts of  a human life. Things do fall apart and everyone walks miles alone. At such times, you find a shade in books. Sometimes your hobbies quench your thirst. For some it is paintings, for some it is singing, for some it is travelling and for people like me- it is blogging. 

Damn it. Some people ask me– Why not keep a diary. Why blog? Why wash your dirty linen over the web. For some I respond, “It is none of your business.” To some my response is ” Whatever.” For me, with my lips tightened, I talk to myself.  This offers me an opportunity to blast my emotions knowing that even if people important to me don’t read it, it offers me a solace that someone unknown is perhaps reading it and emphatize with me.Even if they don’t who cares. You are reading my blog, shows that you care! So whatever! You read my blog. So better learn to get used to my cribs. 

Ahoy, do I appear rude? Yes, off course. But who cares? This is my blog and I will write what I want. You don’t like it? You leave my blog! Now! Awwww… angry? Why? Because I make a dig at you for reasons unknown to you? May be I am removing someone else’s anger and frustration on you? Now relax, take a deep breathe and think- Is there someone who is taking out their pent frustration of you on someone else? Are you being judgmental? Will you ever know, what I write, what I think and why? No, you will never, until you walk in my shoes. So, stop being judgmental. Stop reading too much into people. Everyone is fighting a battle of their own. You are happy with whatever you have? Good! Stop expecting the same out of people. Perhaps, people have different goals! Stop judging them. You have no beauty and you are happy? Fine! Don’t expect the same out of me. You are caring and I am not? Don’t expect the same out of me. You don’t have money and are still happy? Good for you. Don’t expect the same out of me. Yes, we share the same sky and earth. But that necessarily doesn’t mean we share the same horizons.

So stop judging me. Otherwise don’t cry when things fall apart…..

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Sir Alex Ferguson- The sun sets

Sir Alex Ferguson- rings a bell? Do you know him? Off, course, what a daft question is this? Football fans need no introduction. And perhaps the most disconnected person will also recollect his name as one of the celebrity, if not know his exact profile.

So, why a post on him today? He’s retired! Yes, the god of County football or whatever is its name- the manager of one of the most determined and successful clubs- Manchester United bids adieu. He is the one who built this team from scratch. Apparently,in his 26 years of career, the club has bagged the Barclays Premier League title for 38 times. Woah!

So? Am I a football fan? Do I follow the club? No, I don’t think so. Apart from Ronaldino or Rooney I don’t know anybody. I don’t even think, I have spelt the first guy’s name properly. However, I have experience the energy and the exuberance of these names.

I have seen the frenzy during Manchester United matches. How? When my friends – off course guy friends used to watch it. They used to talk it. Uff the dushmani tales they spoke for Chelsea and Manchester United. “Don’t say ManU. It sounds like Fuck U!” said someone. I was appalled. I was like what the hell! What non-sense. How can you be such morons. Why worship some game instead of following. I did not understand.

Then one day my brother did this———

ImageHe painted one of the walls in the room! Oh dear lord! What was this? I was so mad at him, I felt like slapping him. And then the truth was revealed.  You can read the truth here: 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Manchester_United_F.C.

And after this, there was no looking back. I don’t care, If I don’t understand Football. I don’t care if I don’t know the terms of this game. Doesn’t matter, if I know the people playing for this club.

All I know, is that Manchester United rose like Phoenix. Sir Alex Ferguson helped Manchester to become what it is today! Atleast he was instrumental. This is one of the best stories! 

And everything, that makes for one of the most touching- stories, makes a way in my blog 🙂

Adios Sir Alex Ferguson. I am sure, your fans, staff colleagues, players  will miss you!

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“What will make you happier than you are now? Why?”

I have been wanting to blog since a long time. However, thanks to some mind-boggling and life-changing (or so called) stuff, I haven’t been. Oh, ya I got engaged by the way. So ya, now you get the point.

Anyway, coming back to the original topic left blogging for some days. Now, I am back to the grind. This time, though I am struggling to write. I have a strategy. When I face, a writers’ block, I usually turn to Penzu or Goodreads for quotes. I look at these quotes and decide to pen down my thoughts on the same.

This time the quote glared at me. It actually offered me to ask, what I have been meaning to ask one and everyone I meet. “What will make you happy?”

Well, as of now I have no answer to this. Or may be I know. For today, the answer is “I will never be as happy as I am as of this moment, this minute.”

Yes. That’s it. I am happy this moment and that is all that matters. Nothing more, nothing less.

I don’t know what tomorrow will bring. I have to forgive my past, so that I can live today. Today is my first and only day.

There there is nothing that will make me happier than I am now. Never. Ever.

 

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Building a career in Public Relations

So, you have completed your graduation and landed a job in your dream PR firm? Good. Now is the time to prove yourself. Get, set and go! 

Cut to one year. Cut to two years. Cut to three years. You are now no more considered as a fresher in the PR business. There are youngsters working under you now. You now have the responsibility to manage your own team. In the last three years, perhaps you have worked your ass off! You have garnered “coverage” for your clients- in The Times of India, The Economic Times, CNBC TV 18, etc.  Awesome!

But you feel stuck. You are doing the same old monotonous work everyday. You are creating strategies  plans and reports for your clients. You are writing pitch notes and calling the same set of journalists, perhaps being bashed by them anonymously on social networking sites. 

Well! This happens to most of us. Most of us often land these jobs, being the brightest students of our respective academies. Well to be honest, most of us are stars in our own little sense. However, why do we have often end up in the situation mentioned above? Because we get stuck in our daily ‘jobs.’ We forget, that we are here to build careers and not do our ‘jobs.’

So here’s what it takes to build a great ‘career’ in the business of communication:

  1. Do your homework: Yes, no wonder, whatever you do, no use if your basics are not right in the place. Know your media, know your client, know your profession, know your business, assess and build on your own strengths and weaknesses. Set your goals and objectives. Make yourself a short-term and long- term plan and then walk towards achieving it.
  2. Technology to enable you!: If you want to achieve success, then you must be ready to do whatever it takes to. Thanks to advent of social media and new technologies, we can easily connect with people and situations. You might not realize, but there is real power in having smart-phones and accessing the world through apps. Not that I am propagating materialism, but I just realized small changes these things bring to our life, when a friend recently casually remarked that smart-phone has changed his reading and content consumption habits drastically impacting his knowledge and skills.
  3. Networking: One of the most ignored things by people is the power of networking! It is good to keep doing your work and get appreciation by clients, colleagues and bosses! However, a career is not carved out steady growth but by break-out opportunities. Therefore it is crucial that professionals go out and attend seminars, business conferences, community cocktail parties etc. Networking is not necessarily about getting new business leads or jobs! Sometimes, it is all about meeting the right people, at the right time and learning from their experiences and ideas.

Just a few simple steps can send your career up flying in the sky..

Do drop me a line, if there are any other tips that you think, helped you to build a great career in the field of ‘Public Relations.’  🙂

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Is there any reason for startups to hire PR firms to help with their launch? Or is this needless cash burn?

Answer by Deepika Gumaste:

The answer to this question depends on three questions:

  1. What are you trying to achieve/What are your objectives?
  2. What are your budgets?
  3. What kind of resources you have access to?

Out of this the most important questions are- resources and budgets. For many companies, specifically start-ups, a whole lot of decisions depend on budgets and resources. Do you have the kind of people with specific skill sets and expertise to do PR activities for your start-up? If no, then it is recommended to outsource your activities to experts and knowledgeable people who are equipped to manage your company’s communications.

Also if your activities are on a small-scale, you might be able to manage with a small team of in-house consultants. However, if you are looking to scale-up a PR firm always helps.

Also, most of the times, it is possible that if you have in-house people, they might be obsessed with internal details and might not be able to judge situations and have insights. The in-house team might be more obsessed with the product/company/service rather than being focused on what the customer wants.

Therefore, a third-party perspective always help.

Hope this helps.

My $ 0.02

Cheers
D

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